Addressing Political Divisiveness in the Workplace
Now more than ever, our country is a divided place. Differing opinions on the COVID-19 crisis along with what is sure to be a contentious political election can make for an uncomfortable work environment. Traci and Rob discuss why leaders shouldn’t shy away from this challenge. Rather they should intentionally set ground rules to maintain a strong and cohesive culture.
Transcript
Rob:
Hey, Traci. I was just thinking the other day, the current environment, does the workplace seem more divisive than ever to you?
Traci:
Absolutely, and I think it's going to get even worse, because guess what? There's something big coming up in November.
Rob:
You mean Thanksgiving?
Traci:
I wish it was just Thanksgiving. I have a feeling our Thanksgiving tables are going to be even crazier to navigate and our workplaces are going to be crazier to navigate, especially as we start coming closer to a new election this year, coming off of all the COVID debate as well.
There is a lot that leaders and owners of companies have to navigate right now, as far as team dynamics and being human and really managing humans through this divisiveness and through these hot topics. I think there's decisions and things to think about. How do leaders and how do you as an owner and leader of a team, how are you addressing this? How are you thinking about the next six months ahead of you when you think about these things?
Announcer:
Welcome to the Overly Human podcast, where we discuss all things human in the workplace. Because it's not just business—it's personal too.
Rob:
It's hard because there's not a one size fits all answer—it doesn't feel like. It's complicated based on where you're at in the country, what you believe, and we all have baggage with this stuff too. I know that for me, I hate the idea that I would be someone who would tell people what they're allowed to talk about and what they're not allowed to talk about outside of hate speech and clearly things that are over the line. There's a lot of unknowns and I really don't like the idea that I would say is like, "Hey, these topics need to be off the table." I really want to believe that people are mature enough to have those conversations with each other and still be friends at the end.
The last couple of years has made me rethink that belief and made me wonder that maybe people aren't mature enough to respectfully disagree and still be okay with each other at the end of the conversation.
Traci:
Yeah. I think it's something to think about, and I think it's hard, but this is a test of our leadership. I think that we have to lead through this. I think in the past there's always been this sort of, we don't talk about religion, politics, sex, any of those things in the workplace. We just shut it down.
Today I think there's more pressure on leaders and owners of businesses because there is a new generation that's working with and for us. Transparency and authenticity tend to be key values, as does inclusivity. And what does it really mean to have an inclusive workplace?
So I'm not sure 100% silence can be the policy that we set as leaders today. We have to sort of think about boundaries, what are the boundaries we can set as leaders, and what tools can we use to help our employees who might not be as mature or as gifted in having these conversations. How can we help them and guide them using things like our core values or setting certain boundaries or having open conversations ahead of time, where we talk about how we communicate with each other, and remind people, whether it's a political conversation, a religious conversation, or even how we manage a project conversation, how do we respectfully deal with each other and how do we criticize maybe ideas or policies, our processes, but not the person we're talking to. Can we teach that and lead people through that?
Rob:
Yeah. And I think it's...I wonder. I also believe that the medium that we're communicating over is also...adds to the challenge. It's really easy to read intent into things like Slack or written communication that are happening in a personal level, and it's easy to ignore the humanity of who you're talking to. I think that's a huge part of this.
I think the other part that I've seen over and over again is it's really, really easy to disagree and to have passionate arguments and to not want to compromise when we're talking about theories, but when we start putting people behind those ideas, you're faced with the humanity that you have to confront. I think those are really important parts of all this.
Traci:
Yeah. Yeah. I mean, we just had an episode where we talked about emotional intelligence and a lot of this has to do with emotional intelligence, that maturity, the ability to have some self-restraint and thoughtfulness while you're having these discussions. Seeing each other as humans that are different and come at the world with different points of view and honoring that. That takes a amount of emotional intelligence and empathy and all these things that we talked about, being able to put ourselves in other people's shoes and to listen, and to be curious before we're certain and having an attitude to learn, not change somebody's mind.
I think that the culture we're in today is that we're so divided because we have given up learning from each other and trying to just change each other's minds or trying to just get you to believe what I believe. And that's a really hard, difficult, and mostly futile battle to try to enter into. But an inclusive environment in the workplace means that everybody has a voice and everybody can be heard and we can learn from each other, even if we agree to disagree in the end. And that can strengthen culture, that can strengthen our community, not tear us apart.
Rob:
Yeah. Well, I think that whole agreeing to disagree is what I've seen change over the last several years is we're not okay doing that anymore. There are some things, people we all have these bright lines that we won't allow other people to cross. So much of the conversation that I hear is not people listening, but people waiting for their turn to talk.
I think that's a really dangerous place to be, and I think that one of the things that ... I think one of the bits of wisdom that I've picked up along the way of doing, running my own company for 11 years now is entering into every situation and every new conversation allowing for the possibility to be wrong about things that I'm completely sure of. And having that attitude allows people to have conversations and listen, even if you don't ultimately change your mind or are swayed, but to listen with that intent allows you to learn a bunch of new things.
Traci:
Yeah. You have to enter into a place of vulnerability with that in putting your ego aside because too often we're driven by our ego and our ego wants to be right. So if we want to be right, we will protect ourselves by not opening ourselves up to learning more, gaining more knowledge, hearing other people's points of view, even slightly agreeing with somebody else's opinion, because we feel like that might attack us being right.
I think if we can put our egos aside and enter into every conversation with, "I'm not 100% certain or sure, and I'm open to learn, but this is what I believe," and coming out of the other side of the conversation, "I might still believe that, but at least hopefully I've grown, especially in my empathy, when I hear and understand somebody else's point of view."
I could vehemently disagree with them and I can think, "Wow, that's not something I ever could adopt for myself," but I can still try to see where the person's coming from and why they feel the way that they do. If that's all I gain from that conversation, that's a lot. And that helps me as a leader, it helps me as a human being, and it grows my relationship with that person. So I think you're absolutely right about too often people aren't truly listening. They're just trying to get to the place, the break in the conversation where they can enter in.
So I often coach people, repeat what the person just said to you. And if that's the task ahead of you, that you have to repeat, that's going to make you listen. Then when you repeat back, "So, what you're saying is," or, "What I hear you saying is this." Then the person's like, "Oh my gosh, they were actually listening to me. That's so rare." Usually, we know that people are waiting to just get their word in, and then they'll do the same thing in return, and you usually—9 times out of 10—are going to end up with a pretty fruitful, full, and respectful conversation that you've had. That takes a lot though. It really takes a tremendous amount of intentionality.
Rob:
I agree, and I like the idea of repeating things, what you've just heard to let them know you were listening, as I'm doing right here. But I think that's the work, right? So much of the challenges we have in our workplaces, they're not the projects. They're not operations. They're not all those things. It's the human things. And our personal relationships with our coworkers allow us to collaborate and be collectively smarter than any one of the pieces.
And you know, it is hard, but it's one of those things. What you believe about humans is hugely impactful here. You can either believe that people have the ability to change over time, or that people are who they are and can't change. And I don't think that believing people can't change isn't something that's productive, but at the same time, what I've learned is change and being open to it is a choice one has to make, and you can't make it for them. You can't convince somebody to change. You can't make them do anything or change their beliefs.
But what you can do is, if they're open to it, have some good conversations and listen to them and they will respect that and then present other ideas. Then if they make the choice, they can choose to be wrong about things or adopt some of those kind of thoughts. I think that's a huge piece of what's missing in our workplaces.
Traci:
Yeah. And I think it really is on the leader to do exactly what you're saying. We have to lead and set the example, and we have to have open conversations about this. I would encourage the people that are listening to this that are leading, managing teams, running companies to—when you're done listening to this—to stop and think. How do I want to address this in the workplace? Don't wait, set your policy. Understand how you're not going to tolerate bad behavior. Have an open conversation about all these things we're talking about, about having healthy conflict, about validating each other even if you don't agree, about learning to be respectful, apologizing if necessary, following our core values, having some self restraint.
Have that open conversation and then say, "Look, I'm not going to shy away from this. This is going to be happening over the next few months. We might be coming back together in the office for the first time after what has been a really hard time, and everybody's going to have different points of view on whether we should have stayed home or not stay at home, and people are going to have different points of view about the election. Let's honor each other. Let's remember what our core values are, how we need to be towards each other. Let's set some ground rules."
And there's policies that you can set. I think owners need to know legally what they're allowed to do and not do, and there are different rules by state, but I think in a private workplace for the most part, employees can set policy around this and you can say, "Hey, here's some basic things we're going to do," like maybe petitions or fundraising or dressing or hanging posters or doing anything. We're going to leave that all out of the workplace. But if you were going to have conversations about it in the workplace, that's fine. I want there to always be healthy conflict, but here's some of the ground rules.
And I think I just want to encourage the leaders listening to us today, don't shy away, sit down with a pen and paper with your business partner and your leadership team and say, "What's going to be our policy and what are our ground rules for the rest of 2020, what's it going to look like? Let's just go full force and really look at this."
Rob:
Yeah, I think that's really good. And I think that that is the work is getting out in front of it, because I've learned the hard way a couple of times that picking up the pieces after the fact doesn't work, usually feelings are already hurt and things have already been said that you can't ever put back in some cases, and I think that's a dangerous place to be.
What do you do with the difference between work voice and outside voice, because there's some blurry lines out there, especially when you talk about social media or other pieces like that. I'm not just Rob, the owner of Sparkbox, employee of Sparkbox. I'm also Rob the human that is involved in maybe a church or Facebook groups or very political things, which is things that I can and should be involved with, if those are my passions.
Traci:
I think how you act on social media should reflect who you are as a leader. So I know in certain companies, and I know in my own experience when you're an executive of a really big, visible company, I just made the choice of not saying anything. To me, that was a safer place for me to be. It was just a way for me to kind of avoid entering into that. That's not right for everybody. It was right for me.
But what I will say is if you're active on social media and you're tweeting, or you're posting, just be careful that you are doing it in a way, the same way you would do it in the workplace, that you're being respectful, that you're being conscientious about your wording, that you are being thoughtful about what you're reposting.
And if you have that internal thing, that voice that's saying, "Ooh, I don't know if this is a good idea," or, "Maybe some people are going to," maybe just don't repost it or don't post it and wait for something that's a little bit more respectful. But again, you can post things in a way, like, "I know that maybe not everybody's going to agree with this, and there are different ways of looking at it." But so again, just framing it.
But remembering you are an authority, you're an authority figure. You're a leader. The way you act, the decisions you make, what you do, whether you feel like it's unfair or not, it will come back to you. People are watching you, they're wondering, and it will affect the entire team that you oversee. And that's just the cold, hard fact of being a leader.
Rob:
Yeah, it is. People are watching, and I would make the argument, and I agree with what you just said, is the statements that I would make for the most part are not as important as the relationships that I have with people and not being in a place where there's conflict there. And I think that's really important is when we're managing and working with people that we consider the relationships that we have and the value they bring and not build walls, but build bridges between them.
Traci:
Yeah. And in the end, what's more important? What's more important? That your political view wins or that this human relationship you have is intact. And I think people aren't looking at it that way, but they need to.
Rob:
Yeah, that's so true. One of the quotes that I found as I was preparing for today, because this is an interesting episode that we're talking about some hard things, was something I came across, that I was reminded of and I'll kind of read it here.
"Our culture has accepted two huge lies. The first is that if you disagree with someone's lifestyle, you must fear or hate them. The second is that to love someone means you agree with everything they believe, say, or do. Both are nonsense. You don't have to compromise convictions to be compassionate." And that was said by the always controversial Dave Chappelle.
Traci:
I love it.
Rob:
Unlikely place to find inspiration for this, but.
Traci:
But so true, but so true. I mean, in the end, what are we going to be remembered for? And we talked about this a few episodes ago, like in a crisis, leaders are remembered for years to come in how they respond and react in a crisis. I think this is a year, 2020 is a year that's stretching our leadership abilities to the max, but we will be remembered for years to come in how we have responded and how we have shown up and the things we have said and the compassion and the empathy we have shown for years to come.
Rob:
I like that, judge for how we showed up.
Traci:
Yep. And nobody in the end, years from now, will most likely remember our politics or whatever, but they will remember us as humans, who we were as a human. They will remember.
Rob:
They'll remember how we made them feel.
Traci:
Yes. Yes. So go forth, increase your EQ, be compassionate, and have some self restraint, but enter into the conversation. Enter in.
Rob:
Thanks, Traci.
Traci:
Thank you, Rob. This is a good one. I like talking about it. Scary, but good.
Rob:
Yeah.
Traci:
Till next time.
Traci:
This podcast would not be possible without the amazing communications team at Sparkbox. If you'd like what you've heard, please subscribe and tell your friends to listen as well. The Overly Human podcast is brought to you by Navigate the Journey and Sparkbox. For more information on this podcast, or to get in touch with Traci or Rob, go to overlyhuman.com. Thanks for listening.
